Overall, a very entertaining and thrilling read. The setup is very heartwarming, and you give the audience a reason to see Jeanie's story through to the end. I would definitely rework the angle you're taking with the massive twist at the end. The context and reasoning behind Danny's betrayal needs to be worth the shocking reveal. The climax is well written and very action packed, but it needs something more behind it.
Your story idea is incredibly intriguing and once we finally arrive there the script drastically increases in quality. The problem here is that it takes far too long to get to this point. And then it only gets bogged down by all the characters you keep introducing. I would highly suggest starting the story where it is meant to start which is with the death of the mother. But the story you have when it actually starts is solid.
This was an easy read. You might want to have someone proof read it. There were some grammatical and punctuation errors. It could use a nice polishing. You must have worked extremely hard on this script. It could be made into a very good movie. I wish you the best of luck with it.
In order to prevent Imperialism from dominating the world, a united group of colorful elite travel back in time, risking everything to rewrite history and save humanity from the current reality.
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