Jack Napier owns a vineyard in the outskirts of Gotham City, when he finds out there could be deep amethyst crystal mines under his property he asks family friend Bruce Wayne to help fund the excavation when he refuses, things go horribly wrong.
Overall, this story needs to reduce telling and paint a more vivid picture in the reader's mind. I might be wrong, but there's always room for improvement. You're almost halfway there, and I believe the story's quality will rise when you remove the exposition dumps and fix the philosophical conflict.
SCORE BREAKDOWN:
A. Based on the fundamental elements:
Concept: Poor
Story: Fair
Structure: Poor
Character development: Fair
Dialogue:...
Under British-ruled Ireland, Irish Catholic servant Reanna O’Neil is forced to flee for her life when, in self-defense, she kills her attacker, a British noble. His son-in-law, hot on her heels and out for blood, will stop at nothing to “Make the Irish slattern pay!”.
In a dreamlike reimagining of 19th-century America, a young Abraham Lincoln and those around him navigate forbidden love, societal expectations, and personal identity, as their intertwined fates unravel in a world of passion, tragedy, and resilience.
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