The story of a young man who feels deflated by the people supposedly better off than himself is common and OK. The way this is written is so poor it should have never passed the first 15.
When speaking characters are first introduced, their name is in all caps. So, it should be BOY. Since you couldn't even give him a name, it should always be Boy not boy.
The way your opening VO is written, its over a blank screen?
In the year 2287, the investigation of a Detroit transportation hub bombing leads two corporate investigators to the mega-city's inhospitable foundation level to hunt down a bomber that may or may not be human.
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